Today is another Monday you won't be part of, and it has been 71 since we last cuddled. Next Monday I will be sitting in what has become our NY home, or maybe outside staring at the trees where I used to sit to blog while we are away for the summer. I am trying to prepare for all that is to come next week but knowing my history, it won't matter because something I haven't prepared for will happen.
This past Friday your siblings finally finished school for the year. It is hard to believe next year Laeya will be in 6th grade. I try not to think about you going into 1st. My mind has challenges with the image because sometimes I create a completely fictitious one that involves you completely healthy and unlike the Sonzee we all knew and loved.
Last Thursday was grief group. The activity this week was to write a letter "from you" to myself (and aba's self). I have done that a handful of times since you have been gone and it is always my biggest struggle. I stared at everyone writing for the first 5-10 minutes, nothing could be written, but I finally found a use for those little tissue packs they have in our individual baggies. I eventually managed to get some words on the page, but I felt like it was such a blah letter. Aba and I don't typically talk about our groups with one another, but on Friday he asked me if we also wrote a letter, and then he showed me his. His was far better than mine and I was a mess a few lines in.
I found glitter/sequin boots on Alibaba for Tzvi's hockey team. It was such a daunting task to be able to find the exact colors I wanted, it was literally a multiple hours endeavor of searching. I hope when they arrive (if they arrive), they are what I am anticipating. We got his tournament schedule. There are 7, but we know we are missing one because we will be (G-d willing) in Israel. Yup, we are actually scheduled to go, sans you and nurse Paige. That is sure to be a tough trip since it will be our first "complete" family trip, and it was supposed to include you. Who am I kidding, life is tough regardless of any specific plans.
Please help us all remain healthy this summer, especially this week and throughout camp for your siblings. Know we miss you a LOT!
Until next time,